Civility at Work: Why True North Identity Matters More Than Ever
Over the past two years, I’ve had the privilege of working closely with the leadership team at SHRM — the largest HR organization in the world. Their commitment to elevating civility in the workplace couldn’t be more timely or more needed.
We’re living in a cultural moment where tension is high, patience is low, and long-standing relationships are feeling the strain. Civility isn’t just a “nice-to-have.” It’s becoming a strategic, economic, and human imperative.
What Is Civility?
Civility is respect in action.
It’s treating every person with dignity, humanity, and kindness — even when you disagree.
This isn’t softness. It’s strength.
And the data is clear:
U.S. companies lose $2.1 billion per day to incivility.
Employees lose 40 minutes of productivity after a single rude interaction.
66% say incivility lowers performance.
59% say it damages morale.
Wellbeing suffers: stress, disengagement, burnout, and turnover rise.
And the trend isn’t improving — it’s accelerating.
Why I’m Writing This Now
After the recent act of political violence involving Charlie Kirk, I’ve had dozens of conversations with leaders across industries. The same story keeps coming up:
Teams that worked side-by-side for years — sometimes decades — are suddenly fractured. Words spoken in frustration have broken trust. Professional relationships once built on collaboration and respect feel fragile.
This didn’t start last week, but it did intensify. And it raises a difficult question:
Where are we heading if we don’t course-correct now?
Normally, I avoid political commentary. But this moment is bigger than politics. This is about who we are becoming — in our workplaces, our communities, and our families.
The Heart of the Issue: Identity
The core of our civility crisis is identity.
Identity determines direction.
When anchored to “True North” — values, virtues, and character — it leads to:
Joy
Growth
Peace
Freedom
But when identity is tethered to political affiliation, it produces defensiveness, rigidity, and intolerance. Hearts close. Empathy shrinks. Conversations become battles rather than opportunities.
That's why workplace civility cannot be restored until we help people detach their identity from politics and re-anchor it in enduring values.
What a True North Identity Looks Like
A True North identity is:
Values-based — defined by virtues, not political parties
Secure and adaptable — strong enough to lead, flexible enough to grow
Respectful — extending empathy even in disagreement
Purpose-driven — guided by character and contribution, not ideology
This is the foundation of real civility.
Practical Steps to Apply True North
Clarify your values and virtues — Provides direction and clarity during conflict
Pause before reacting — Ensures responses align with values rather than emotion
Seek shared values — Fosters unity and mutual respect
Lead with curiosity — Opens dialogue instead of shutting it down
Practice character habits daily — Builds trust and long-term transformation
The Call to Level Up
I’ve worked with leaders whose political affiliations I never knew — but whose character spoke volumes. They were:
Courageous
Empathetic
Resilient
Trustworthy
And that’s what mattered.
Civility requires leaders who elevate principles over parties. People who refuse to compromise their values depending on who sits across the table.
Disagreement is healthy.
Disrespect is not.
If you’re in a workplace misaligned with your values, it may be time to transition — but don’t retreat into echo chambers. Diversity of thought, handled with civility, fuels innovation, resilience, and growth.
A Crossroads Moment
We are collectively standing at a crossroads:
One path leads to division, hostility, and decay.
The other leads to civility, growth, and renewal.
If we detach identity from politics and re-anchor in values and virtues, we can heal workplaces, communities, and relationships.
I don’t want to be known merely for my faith — I want my faith to be visible in my character, in how I treat people, and in how I contribute to healthier workplaces.
This is our moment.
Our moment to level up.
To lead with True North.
To build cultures defined by dignity, respect, and resilience.
My Invitation to You
If your organization is feeling the weight of polarization, I would be honored to help guide your teams toward a culture of civility — one where differences aren’t dangerous, but powerful. One where conflict doesn’t erode connection but fuels collaboration and creativity.
Because civility isn’t the absence of conflict.
Civility is the presence of character.
And that is what will shape the future of work.
In radical resilience,
Dr. Andy Garrett, Psy.D.
Founder, True North Radical Resilience